countryheart: Why does it still hurt?
Why does it still hurt?
May 12 2010 at 09:06am
The other day I get an email saying... this is my last email to you. If you want your stuff it will be out by the gate.. But, he brought it into town for me. I was told he never comes to town anymore and for 3 years I was told how I DRUG him to AZ on false pretenses. It was always all my fault so I was made to think. I was the one who lied. I walked on egg shells.. but.. I did..and still do love him.. I have to make myself say I will always love him. I was told he never loved me.
The statements were made. Im taking the house off the market. Im staying in AZ... hummmmm whats up with that.. he is free to move..but he isn't. Then I get the word. He is in a "relationship" Why does this still hurt? I have been out of it now for 8 months and out of the house for 5 months. I have done some dating but I have told myself to go slow..don't jump back into another relationship like I jumped into this last one.. Do I measure everyone to a standard they can't measure up to? Does my love for my ex cloud my judgement?
You find someone..you fall in love.. you have troubles and trials..but you make it work.. there is love.. there are great times.. 3 years was not all a sham. I dont care what I am told, there were a lot of GREAT times! I know it is over.. I know it is time to move on and I feel I have. So after all this crap... why does hearing he is in a relationship hurt? Damn I must really be fucked up. I knew when he told me just a week or two ago that he was just going to be alone. He was done trying to find someone he was just going to be happy alone. That would be the only way he could get through life was to be ALL ALONE!.... Just yet.. one more last lie! sometimes I wish people would just be honest. If he would have said.. I found another.. It would have still hurt yes, but It would have been the truth.
I am a hopeless romantic. I always will be. I give my heart and I just can't turn that all off. I wish it was easier. BUT.. CowboyUP! Git er done! MOVE on!!!
I will move on. I am a strong man with a bright mind and a loving heart! I wish everyone out there well. I hope your trials are small ones.. and most of all "KEEP THE FAITH"
Chuck
The statements were made. Im taking the house off the market. Im staying in AZ... hummmmm whats up with that.. he is free to move..but he isn't. Then I get the word. He is in a "relationship" Why does this still hurt? I have been out of it now for 8 months and out of the house for 5 months. I have done some dating but I have told myself to go slow..don't jump back into another relationship like I jumped into this last one.. Do I measure everyone to a standard they can't measure up to? Does my love for my ex cloud my judgement?
You find someone..you fall in love.. you have troubles and trials..but you make it work.. there is love.. there are great times.. 3 years was not all a sham. I dont care what I am told, there were a lot of GREAT times! I know it is over.. I know it is time to move on and I feel I have. So after all this crap... why does hearing he is in a relationship hurt? Damn I must really be fucked up. I knew when he told me just a week or two ago that he was just going to be alone. He was done trying to find someone he was just going to be happy alone. That would be the only way he could get through life was to be ALL ALONE!.... Just yet.. one more last lie! sometimes I wish people would just be honest. If he would have said.. I found another.. It would have still hurt yes, but It would have been the truth.
I am a hopeless romantic. I always will be. I give my heart and I just can't turn that all off. I wish it was easier. BUT.. CowboyUP! Git er done! MOVE on!!!
I will move on. I am a strong man with a bright mind and a loving heart! I wish everyone out there well. I hope your trials are small ones.. and most of all "KEEP THE FAITH"
Chuck
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